Crazy Field Crashers

From: William N.

Sent: March 31, 2012

To: undisclosed recipients

Subject: Fw: Crazy Field Crashers

Philly fan tasered, fans running on the field, and crashing games. We've got our 17 favorites here. Know of any others? Let us know in the comments!

PHENOMENAL 2 LETTER WORD

From: Mike F.

Sent: March 31, 2012

To: undisclosed recipients

Subject: Fw: PHENOMENAL 2 LETTER WORD

UP

Read until the end ... you'll laugh.

This two-letter word in English has more meanings than any other two-letter word, and that word is'UP.' It is listed in the dictionary as an [adv], [prep], [adj], [n] or [v].

RADIO HOST GETS A CALL, LISTEN, YOU WON'T BELIEVE WHAT YOU HEAR!

From: Carl M.

Sent: March 31, 2012

To: undisclosed recipients

Subject: Fw: RADIO HOST GETS A CALL, LISTEN, YOU WON'T BELIEVE WHAT YOU HEAR!

I OFTEN LISTEN TO MICHAEL SAVAGE. . . . I DON’T SEE HOW HE PUTS UP WITH SOME OF THE CALLERS HE GETS.

DO YOU REALLY, REALLY, WANT TO KNOW WHATIS WRONG IN AMERICA TODAY? JUST LISTEN TO THIS CONVERSATION AND SAY TO YOURSELF (COUNTING THE YOUTH WHO BELIEVE YOU OWE THEM, THE FOLKS ON WELFARE WHO BELIEVE YOU OWE THEM, THE ILLEGALS WHO ARE HERE WHO BELIEVE YOU OWE THEM,) AND THE LIST HAS GROWN NOW TO 47% AND RISING. AS SOON AS THAT NUMBER GETS TO 51% WE WILL END UP LIKE GREECE. RIOTS IN THE STREETS, BANKRUPT, AND LIKE MOST OTHER THRID WORLD COUNTRIES.

She breeds and votes. G-d help our Republic!

Obama's gift to Putin of Alaskan Islands by exec order

From: Paul M.

Sent: March 31, 2012

To: undisclosed recipients

Subject: Fw: Obama's gift to Putin of Alaskan Islands by exec order

BLACK-GOLD BLUES

Obama's giveaway: Oil-rich Alaskan Islands to Russia
Exclusive: Joe Miller sounds alarm over deal to put land in hands of Putin's Kremlin
Published: 02/16/2012 at 7:55 PM
By Joe Miller
The Obama administration, despite the nation’s economic woes, effectively killed the job-producing Keystone Pipeline last month. The Arab Spring is turning the oil production of Libya and other Arab nations over to the Muslim Brotherhood. Iraq is distancing itself from the U.S. And everyone recognizes that Iran, whose crude supplies are critical to the European economy, will do anything it can to frustrate America’s strategic interests. In the face of all of this, Obama insists on cutting back U.S. oil potential with outrageous restrictions.

47 Years Ago...Amazing Prediction

From: Lou N.

Sent: March 31, 2012

To: undisclosed recipients

Subject: Fw: 47 Years Ago...Amazing Prediction

Hey Guys , Do you remember Paul Harvey  ? .... these haunting words of 47 years ago have come true !

TURN UP THE VOLUME

Do you remember the famous ABC radio news commentator Paul Harvey?
Millions of Americans listened to his programs which were broadcast over 1,200 radio stations nationwide.  He sure knew what he was talking about.  Quite a prognosticator.
The following commentary was broadcast 47 years ago.... April 3, 1965.
I hope you will listen to this. It's short...less than 3 minutes.

Funeral Expenses

From: Al K.

Sent: March 31, 2012

To: undisclosed recipients

Subject: Fw: Funeral Expenses

A WOMAN AND HER EVER-NAGGING HUSBAND WENT ON VACATION IN JERUSALEM .
WHILE THEY WERE THERE, THE HUSBAND PASSED AWAY.
THE UNDERTAKER TOLD THE WIFE,
"YOU CAN HAVE HIM BURIED HERE IN THE HOLY LAND FOR $150
OR WE CAN HAVE HIM SHIPPED BACK STATESIDE FOR $5,000.
THE WIFE THOUGHT ABOUT IT AND TOLD THE UNDERTAKER SHE WOULD HAVE HIM SHIPPED BACK HOME. THE UNDERTAKER ASKED HER, "WHY WOULD YOU SPEND $5,000 TO HAVE HIM SHIPPED HOME WHEN YOU COULD HAVE A BEAUTIFUL BURIAL HERE,
AND IT WOULD ONLY COST $150????"

THE WIFE REPLIED,
"LONG AGO, A MAN DIED HERE, WAS BURIED HERE, AND THREE DAYS LATER, HE ROSE FROM THE DEAD.

I JUST CAN’T TAKE THAT CHANCE!"

From: Jan J.

Sent: March 31, 2012

To: undisclosed recipients

Subject: Fw: RUSSIAN MEDIA EXPOSE OBAMA BIRTH 'FORGERY'

Read this one to the very end. Forget the forged birth certificate. There is another angle that could be pursued.

RUSSIAN MEDIA EXPOSE OBAMA BIRTH 'FORGERY'

But American news agencies still absent on presidential scandal.

by Chelsea Schilling

Chelsea Schilling is a commentary editor and staff writer for WND,

an editor of Jerome Corsi's Red Alert, and a proud homeschooling

mother of two. Schilling joined the Army at age 17, receiving the rare

designation of expert marksman three times. In addition to WND,

Schilling has worked as a news producer at USA Radio Network

and as a news reporter for the Sacramento Union.

REMEMBER NADIA COMANECCI?

From: Dave W.

Sent: March 31, 2012

To: undisclosed recipients

Subject: Fw: REMEMBER NADIA COMANECCI?

Remember Nadia Comanecci?  She was the Romanian gymnast who was 14 years old in the 1960's  She won all of the gold medals in the Olympics.  She used to attend the competitions with her teddy bear.

Well this young lady is her granddaughter.  You will enjoy this.

Name The Picture

From: Al C.

Sent: March 31, 2012

To: undisclosed recipients

Subject: Fw: Name The Pictures

These are pretty clever.

Don't rush. Study each picture (there are 11 of 'em) and try to determine what it represents, before looking at the answer below the picture.

You'll need to put on your thinking caps...

What is it?

 eggplant

Motorist dressed as Batman escapes ticket

From: Sue D.

Sent: March 30, 2012

To: undisclosed recipients

Subject: Fw: Motorist dressed as Batman escapes ticket

ROCKVILLE, Md. --

Police in Maryland pulled over a motorist dressed as Batman, but the caped crusader escaped without a ticket.

Authorities pulled over the driver of a black Lamborghini with Batman logo tags last week in Silver Spring outside Washington. The driver was dressed as the Dark Knight — cape, mask and all. Police, however, weren't impressed and wanted to talk to him about his superhero logo license plate, which isn't an approved plate in the state.

The driver, who goes by Lenny B. Robinson when not dressed as a superhero to visit sick children at hospitals, was able to show them a proper license plate for the car. A video of the stop shows police officers shaking his hand and taking pictures of him with his ride.

http://www2.insidenova.com

Obama take over this time of farmers children

From: Kim L.

Sent: March 29, 2012

To: undisclosed recipients

Subject: Fw: Obama take over this time of farmers children

My thoughts on this.......

I'll let you soon.

On Thu, Mar 29, 2012 at 11:27 PM, <Kim L..> wrote: 

This is not political, this is absolutely ridiculous. The Federal Government is going WAAAAY to far. Ron

-----

Unbelievable

OK...sit down for this one ! Where do they come up with the crap ?

Are they having a 'Who can make the worst Bill' contest ?

This one is hot off the press and another Obama take over this time of farmers children.

Comments:

• This is not just another imperious assault of the tyrannical Federal hydra, this is a marxist regulatory incursion toward a central government takeover of all farming operations in America.

  Remember that the communist manifesto specifically calls for the central government to control all agriculture. Traditionally, this has always been used to create famines to murder millions of Citizens politically opposed to the central governments marxist policies.

  Don't think it can't happen here.

  Lentenlands 2 weeks ago
• You are correct, I remember from school all the talk of Russia and the government ran farms and how the Russian people were starving to death. Now it seems the schools are teaching collectivism, praising Mao Tse-Tung and "The better life".

  cablenewsguy in reply to Lentenlands 2 weeks ago

Drano, tin foil, and a little water in plastic drink bottles

From: Sam H.

Sent: March 29, 2012

To: undisclosed recipients

Subject: Fw: Drano, tin foil, and a little water in plastic drink bottles

My thoughts on this...

The potential threat described is real. Homemade chemical bottle bombs can indeed be made from commonly available substances, including Drano. Young pranksters have been creating such bombs for decades and a number of injuries have resulted, both to the bomb makers themselves and people who have inadvertently handled the devices. 

---------------------------------

Warning.

Kids are putting Drano, tin foil, and a little water in plastic drink bottles
and capping it up - leaving it on lawns, in mail boxes, in gardens, on
driveways etc. just waiting for you to pick it up intending to put it in the
rubbish, but you'll never make it!!!

If the bottle is picked up, and the bottle is shaken even just a little - in
about 30 seconds or less it builds up enough gas which then explodes with
enough force to remove some your extremities. The liquid that comes out is
boiling hot as well.

Don't pick up any plastic bottles that may be lying in your yards or in the
gutter, etc.

Pay attention to this. A plastic bottle with a cap. A little Drano. A little
water. A small piece of foil.
Disturb it by moving it; and BOOM!!

DO YOU BELIEVE IN LIFE AFTER DEATH?

From: William B.

Sent: March 30, 2012

To: undisclosed recipients

Subject: Fw: DO YOU BELIEVE IN LIFE AFTER DEATH?

'DO YOU BELIEVE IN LIFE AFTER DEATH?' THE BOSS ASKED ONE OF HIS EMPLOYEES.
'YES, SIR,' THE NEW EMPLOYEE REPLIED.  'WELL, THEN, THAT MAKES EVERYTHING JUST FINE,' THE BOSS WENT ON. 'AFTER YOU LEFT EARLY YESTERDAY TO GO TO YOUR GRANDMOTHER'S FUNERAL,SHE STOPPED IN TO SEE YOU!

 PALM SUNDAY: IT WAS PALM SUNDAY AND, BECAUSE OF A SORE THROAT, FIVE-YEAR-OLD JOHNNY STAYED HOME FROM CHURCH WITH A SITTER. WHEN THE FAMILY RETURNED HOME, THEY WERE CARRYING SEVERAL PALM BRANCHES. THE BOY ASKED WHAT THEY WERE FOR. 'PEOPLE HELD THEM OVER JESUS' HEAD AS HE WALKED BY.'
'WOULDN'T YOU KNOW IT,' THE BOY FUMED, 'THE ONE SUNDAY I DON'T GO, HE SHOWS UP!'

Did you ever think you'd see this in your lifetime?

From: Janet B.

Sent: March 29, 2012

To: undisclosed recipients

Subject: Fw: Did you ever think you'd see this in your lifetime?

Here's my thought on this. First and this may not be the point but doesn't Allah mean God? I think we need to be very careful as a nation to not draw battle lines when it comes to beliefs. I don't agree with defacing our currency with religious slogans or anything else as far as that goes but this email below is the type of smack that causes strife and discontent among us all. I'm just sick of all of the picking and rhetoric. Please add your thought below in the comments box.


On Thu, Mar 29, 2012 at 11:27 PM, <Janet B.> wrote:

Shocking!

Wonder why they didn't mark a $100 bill instead of just a $1 bill. Maybe that's all they think Allah is worth?
A lady in Monte Vista, CO had this dollar bill.This is her story. You don't think we're in a war?
These are starting to show up around our country! After dinner
she took a $1 dollar bill out of her purse and displayed it on the
table. Underneath the words "In God We Trust" someone had
stamped the dollar bill in red ink---NO GOD BUT ALLAH.
We asked her where she had gotten this dollar bill. She said it was part of her change in Alamosa, CO. We took a picture of her dollar bill. If anyone tries to give you one of these dollar bills as change, please refuse it and ask them to give you a dollar bill that has not been defaced. 

Hilarious Asian Pranks

From: Greg C.

Sent: March 29, 2012

To: undisclosed recipients

Subject: Fw: Hilarious Asian Pranks

Check this out.......funny!

Most pranks are dumb and the makers think it is funny but when Asians do Pranks it IS funny every asian prank I have seen is Funny not wannabe funny.

Too much car stereo

From: Jake S.

Sent: March 29, 2012

To: undisclosed recipients

Subject: Fw: Too much car stereo

Anyway, I had a lovely new stereo installed in my 4x4 a few weeks ago. With all of the miles I do back and forth to work I figured I needed some decent tunes instead of simply relying on random radio DJs to offer me worthwhile choices, so I had something put in. It was great for 1 day. Then I went to drive myself to work, only to discover that the truck is totally dead. No electricity. It seems something has drained the battery all the way down, and when I try to put it on a battery charger, the charger flashes at me and won't charge. I wonder what could have caused this?

Pool table skills you have never seen before

From: Tony Y.

Sent: March 29, 2012

To: undisclosed recipients

Subject: Fw: Pool table skills you have never seen before

Definition for billiards or Pool:

Web definitions:

any of several games played on rectangular cloth-covered table (with cushioned edges) in which long tapering cue sticks are used to propel ivory (or composition) balls.

Jimmy White has performed the curve shots countless of times more than 20 years ago. Nothing novelty, its pretty much the same old technique after all. The girl is there to distract the viewers and make their minds thing that this is something unique. oh well~

What the .......

Army Ranger

From: Todd T.

Sent: March 29, 2012

To: undisclosed recipients

Subject: Fw: Army Ranger

PLEASE  do not miss this video. You may be as surprised AS I WAS !!!!!!!!!!!!

Many people may have forgotten about his time in the U.S. Army. He is the son of an Air Force General, and an accomplished Golden Gloves boxer, and he graduated from Pomona College with a B.S. degree, and then became a Rhodes Scholar from Oxford University .

He joined the U.S. Army at the prompting of his father. After graduating from Officer Candidate School he attended and graduated from both Army Airborne and Ranger training in the very top of each class. He was selected for U. S. Army Special Forces Training but refused so that he could attend pilot training where he earned his wings, and became an accomplished U.S. Army helicopter (gun ship) pilot, and achieved the rank of Captain.

I want to travel the world in a RV

From: June R.

Sent: March 29, 2012

To: undisclosed recipients

Subject: Fw: I want to travel the world in a RV

When I first bought an RV to live in last year a lot of people thought that it was a phase I would quickly snap out of. Part of me thought the same thing. Would a move from a 2000 square foot condo to a 100 square foot RV be bearable?

As it turned out, it was more than bearable. I loved it. When I left the country to travel, I sold everything including the RV I loved so much. Seven months later, back in Austin and faced with the proposition of finding somewhere to live, the decision was simple.

To buy this beautiful VW RV and hit the strip. YiHa! 

No Whining

From: Dan F.

Sent: March 29, 2012

To: undisclosed recipients

Subject: Fw: No Whining

whiningpresent participle of whine (Verb)

Verb:

Give or make a long, high-pitched complaining cry or sound. Complain in a feeble or petulant way.

When any fit of gloominess, or perversion of mind, lays hold upon you, make it a rule not to publish it by complaints.  ~Samuel Johnson

Considering what is happening in our country - WHAT IF HE IS RIGHT

From: 

Sent: March 23, 2012

To: undisclosed recipients

Subject: Fw: Considering what is happening in our country - WHAT IF HE IS RIGHT

WHAT IF HE IS RIGHT?


Considering what is happening in our country - WHAT IF HE IS RIGHT??? 


So frightening – it scares me to death!!! I hope you find the time to read this with an open mind. Take the three minutes to read this. Maybe he is wrong, but what if he’s right? David Kaiser is a respected historian whose published works have covered a broad range of topics, from European Warfare to American League Baseball. Born in 1947, the son of a diplomat, Kaiser spent his childhood in three capital cities: Washington D.C., Albany, New York, and Dakar, Senegal. He attended Harvard University, graduating there in 1969 with a B.A. in history. He then spent several years more at Harvard, gaining a PhD in history, which he obtained in 1976. 

geeks versus nerds

From: Dave G.

Sent: Thursday, March 29, 2012 10:15 AM

To: Den

Subject: Fw: geeks versus nerds

If you ever wondered.

geeksplural of geek (Noun)

Noun:

An unfashionable or socially inept person. A person with an eccentric devotion to a particular interest: "a computer geek".

nerdsplural of nerd (Noun)

Noun:

A foolish or contemptible person who lacks social skills or is boringly studious: "one of those nerds who never asked a girl to dance". An intelligent, single-minded expert in a particular technical discipline or profession.

Blind Dog Who Was Found In Trash Heap

From:

Sent: Wednesday, March 28, 2012 10:30 PM

To:

Subject: Fw: Blind Dog Who Was Found In Trash Heap

Last year, Eldad and Audrey Hagar found Fiona -- sick, blind, flea-infested and covered in grime -- in a trash heap in South Los Angeles. "She was just so defeated," said Eldad Hagar, who captured the rescue on video, said. "Blind, filthy, everything was going against her. There seemed to be no hope there." Eldad Hargar, 36, and his wife, Audrey, 37, who are the founders of Hope For Paws, a Los Angeles-based animal rescue organization that takes in abused and neglected animals, gathered the traumatized dog in their arms and immediately took her home.

They shaved off her matted fur and cleaned off the dirt -- thus beginning Fiona's miraculous transformation. Thanks to a nationwide fundraising effort spearheaded by the Hagars, hundreds reached into their pockets, and Fiona received a $4,000 eye surgery that replaced the lens in one of her eyes, partially restoring her vision. (Unfortunately, her other eye had been too badly damaged by glaucoma to be saved.) The Hagars' video of Fiona's rescue and recovery has since gone viral. The YouTube page has more than 48,000 hits and a number of news organizations have reported her story. Following the surgery, Fiona -- a poodle mix -- was adopted and according to Eldad Hagar, is "doing amazing." The couple hope that Fiona's story will inspire others to help abandoned animals. "We're so happy that people are watching this and learning," Eldad Hagar said. "We want people to react to this. Next time you see an animal on the street, call someone or do something. If you can't help, then get help." Often, he said, all they need is a bath. "The change is instant," he said. "

No Enemies

From:

Sent: Wednesday, March 28, 2012 8:51 PM

To:

Subject: Fw: No Enemies

Let's hope this happens  to all of us!   98 and no enemies - human interest story

All  women should live so long as to be this kind of  lady!
Toward the end of Sunday service, the Minister  asked, "How many of you have forgiven your enemies?"
Eighty percent held up their  hands.
The Minister then repeated his question. All  responded this time, except one small elderly lady.
"Mrs. Neely? Are you not willing to forgive your enemies?"
"I don't have any," she replied, smiling sweetly.
"Mrs. Neely, that is very unusual.  How old are you?"
"Ninety-eight," she replied. The congregation stood up and clapped their hands.
"Oh,  Mrs. Neely, would you please come down in front and tell  us all how a person can live ninety-eight years and not have an enemy in the world?"
The little sweetheart of a lady tottered down the aisle, faced the congregation, and said, "I  outlived the bitches." 

Growing old together

From:

Sent: Wednesday, March 28, 2012 8:15 PM

To:

Subject: Fw: Growing old together

I was always able to see [us] as this little old couple sitting on a park bench. When things are bugging me, I think… Will I still care about this when we’re sitting on that park bench? If not, then let it go. But if I will, then it is worth talking through.
- Kelly Allen
Married to husband Matt since 1991

Funny Gym Bloopers

From:

Sent: Wednesday, March 28, 2012 6:51 PM

To:

Subject: Fw: Funny Gym Bloopers

These are so darn funny!

http://hobbysocialnetwork.net presents a fun compilation of hilarious gym antics including cats running on tread mills, a guy racing his bike on his treadmill, a guy having his legs whipped over his head by a loading spring and many more fun bloopers.

THE MARINES WANT THIS TO ROLL ALL OVER THE U.S.

From:

Sent: Wednesday, March 28, 2012 4:51 PM

To:

Subject: Fw: THE MARINES WANT THIS TO ROLL ALL OVER THE U.S.

This was sent to me by Joe, Layman.  Joe flew Huey's in Viet Nam and was and is a  highly decorated hero.  He now serves as spokesperson for our old unit. The names you see listed below are all members of our unit and are all extremely special loving men who sacrificed and risk their lives and limbs for all of our freedom.  I know each of them and witnessed as each left on missions and waited for them when they returned as they did for me.   We all understand the letter the Marine wrote to his Father and we all add our wishes that you help in rolling this all over the US.  Thank all of you for your service to our Country and those of you who did not serve in the Armed Forces, we thank you also for you too served and you are appreciated and cared for just as everyone is.  

THE MARINES WANT THIS TO ROLL ALL OVER THE U.S.

Just too good not to pass on. 


Semper Fi.