Monday, April 16, 2012

10 Quickest Ways To Turn A Guy Off

From: Jill L.
Sent: April 16, 2012
To: undisclosed recipients
Subject: Fw: 10 Quickest Ways To Turn A Guy Off

1. Changing your relationship status on Facebook after the first date
I am not lying when I tell you - this has happened to me. The first date went well (we were all over each other) and we definitely drank more than our fair share of wine. I was definitely excited for the next date. Next day, I got a very interesting notification in my mini-feed saying "Sharon is no longer single." I didn't call her for that second date…

Only ordering salads when we go out on dates

2. Only ordering salads when we go out on dates
Don't be that girl! You're not a rabbit - you're a human. By all means, order a salad as your starter, but there is nothing sexier than a woman who knows how to chow down. I'm not telling you lick your fingers clean at the end of your meal, I'm just telling you to eat like a normal person! A girl who has eating issues is a red flag, and something that we'd rather not get involved with.

3. Bad manicure (or lack thereof)
I'm going to go ahead and say that it's worth it to spring for a pampering session. Though you might think we don't notice, chipped nail polish or chewed down nails can be a quick turn-off. It tells us that you don't care. I was on a date with a girl who seemed to have given herself a manicure while driving on a bumpy road. I mean…really?! I don't mean to be "that guy," but it just wasn't cute.

4. Career-Obsessed
Nothing sucks the excitement out of a relationship more quickly than when I'm wining and dining my lady and she whips out her iPhone so she can promptly answer emails from her boss. I'm all for a woman who works hard and enjoys what she does, but there's a time and place for it - and it's not when I'm trying to look into her eyes over a candlelit dinner.

5. Body hair
Men are bestial creatures. We've been hairy since adolescence and are forced to shave every morning if we don't want to look like a hobo. One of the most refreshing things about a woman is how smooth she is. Don't ruin this fantasy for us. Shave your legs and underarms. Take care of any awkward facial hair you may have. And groom your nether regions!

6. Baby-talk
Don't resort to a baby voice to try and get something you want out of us. I'm not dating a 5-year-old, but a mature woman. Sometimes little girls use this tactic when they want extra spending cash at the mall. I'm not your dad. If you are missing something from me in a relationship, tell me in your real voice and be confident - don't cover it up because you're scared about what my answer might be.

Deodorant issues 7. Deodorant issues
Of course you look stunning in your little black dress, and I certainly appreciate your classic choice…BUT, before you leave the house, make sure your deodorant hasn't rubbed off on your sleeves. There is nothing worse than being distracted by a girl's pits. Also, those accumulated clumps of deodorant on your underarms. I know it's hard to prevent, but be mindful of it before you leave the house!

8. Don' talk about your problems
Everybody has them - it's just part of the human condition. Save it. Don't dote on them and make them the only topic of conversation, seeking my advice or approval. If you're having problems with your family, your ex, your hygiene…it's just kind of a deal breaker. I'm out with you and trying to get to know the best you possible, so bringing unpleasant skeletons out of your closet leaves a bitter taste in my mouth.

9. Don't forget your manners
One of my main rules as a man is classic chivalry. If I invite a woman out for dinner or drinks, I always pay - pull out her chair, and help her with her coat. It's how I was raised. Don't forget to say a simple "thank you." It lets me know that you were raised with good manners, and that you appreciate me. When a woman feels entitled to any sort of special treatment, it tells me that she is just a mean-spirited person. Manners are a must!

10. Only talk about yourself
Don't forget that there are two people in a conversation. I listened so I could score a first date, and because I was generally interested. Once you're out on a date, I want to know that you're also interested in getting to know more about me. Sometimes in the nervousness of the moment, it's easy to forget to reciprocate questions. Be mindful of it.

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